Stag Night

Congratulations. In the grand tradition of your father, your father’s father and his father before him, you’re planning a stag party.  Don’t be too quick to dismiss this honor!! Like helping your friends move, it’s a sacred bond between men that is simply taken too lightly.  You have a great responsibility. You must ensure that an entire lifetime of debauchery is packed into one night and it must be done with the maximum amount of humiliation.   Be proud – although it may weigh heavily on your shoulders now, an excellent stag night will be a badge of honor later on.


Stag Night



Is anything really inappropriate when planning your best friends stag?? Are there really any lines that can be crossed?  This is dependent on the groom.  No one knows him and his tolerance for gluttony/lust like you do; therefore the evening’s events rely on your good taste.  There are a few common sense dos and don’ts however…


DO:  Ensure that the groom gets good n’ loaded. There’s nothing worse than running out of drink half way through the night.


DON’T: Force drinks on the poor soul until he’s having his stomach pumped at your local emergency room. Fun is one thing but alcohol poisoning creates a lack of memories that can last a lifetime.


DO: Be sure that there are enough supplies available if you are planning a house party/poker night.  If you run out half way through the evening, make sure you send someone out to fetch more. This doesn’t mean the groom…pick the one that’s bringing the room down the most and send him – to the furthest shop possible.


DON’T: Decide to experiment with foods, mixing strong spirits etc. There’s a time and place for attempting DIY sushi – this definitely isn’t it!  


DO: Hire a surprisingly attractive middle-aged transvestite stripper.


DON’T: Hire his sister who’s secretly moon lighting as a stripper. (Save that little Jem for another Party.)


The key to remember throughout all of this tomfoolery is that the stag night should be a reflection of the man you’re throwing it for. As much as you’d love to have a football/beer bong/cheerleader party, that might not be his style. Try to be a big man, make a sacrifice and ensure that he gets the kind of party he deserves.


Posted in